Junk Mail – The Truth About Dick Pics September 4, 2019 – Posted in: Sex Advice – Tags: dick pics, sexting
OK boys, I have some really, really important news for you, if you are one of the many naive chaps who send women “junk” mail, also commonly referred to as dick pics.
Online Dating Dick Pic Wake-Up Call
When I first escaped my long-time marriage two years ago I hurriedly joined online dating apps. It felt like online shopping. I could browse profiles and selfies. I thought it was going to be an all-you-could-eat bloke buffet. That was until I stumbled across my first dick pic. “Why?” I mused to myself. I thought it was a one-off. But no. There were more. And with no warning. I cringed internally and was actually pissed at having to look at “it”.
There were more surprises. I’d happily start chatting with a reasonably good looking man, with his life relatively together. We’d exchange numbers and things would progress to gentle flirting. Then suddenly my screen was showing a penis close up, on the bus to work. How did we go from “You are very cute” to “Here’s my penis. Impressed right?”. It wasn’t an isolated event. I was sent a range of male member photographs, all pretty much the same framing and very close up. I was very confused. What had happened to dating in the past 18 years while I was married?
I’m far from a prude, I don’t mind, once a relationship has progressed to the sexy stage, to engage in some sexting of nudie pics back and forth, but only with someone I really trust and who trusts me. And only when I am expecting them.
Why Do Men Send Dick Pics?
Investigation into why men send or post the ubiquitous dick pic, it appears that men want to impress their recipient. It’s a bit like a male peacock fanning his tail at his lady love. Except that it isn’t. Men mostly send pecker pictures in an attempt to “flirt” and elicit a reciprocal a similar image from a woman or get her to agree to a meeting. I see the logic, except that it is flawed. As magnificent as the male member is, it is all about context and timing.
If I am sent penis imagery in response to “Let’s meet up for a drink” I recoil. Literally the last thing getting an unsolicited dick pic makes me want to do is meet the owner, least of all send him a picture of my boobs or lady parts. Seeing an unexpected penis feels downright creepy, like a flasher on the train. You are more likely to annoy or even disgust a woman by sending her your junk images without getting her permission. My reaction will never be “Oh wow, that’s fantastic, here’s a picture of my vulva”. I am likely, as are most women, to get annoyed and block you, even if you have the most incredible penis I have seen. Not really the response you were aiming for.
Dick Pic Etiquette
Please fellas, first ask, if you want to swap sexy photos. Generally however she is more interested in getting to know you first, meeting you and deciding if she wants to make things sexual. That is the point that it may be appropriate, if you check first.
If you get the green light to red light, make sure the photo has a bit of yourself attached. Women like a photo of the entire man, in my opinion, not just the penis. The penis,as wonderful as it is, is not noted for it’s aesthetic appeal to a virtual stranger. Tidy your room, make the lighting flattering and take it from a distance, to include the man as well. It is generally the man, not the penis on its own, we are interested in meeting.
Be careful who you ask for nudes or send pics to. When I was first separated, I was chatting with a friend of 18 years, and we’d always verbally flirted, then suddenly he was sending me dick pics and asking for nudes. My “friend” had turned into a man I didn’t know, or indeed want to. I couldn’t look him n the eye anymore. His flirting was now not so funny or cute.
Final note: if you are horny and want a hook up, be clear at the outset, send “junk” mail only if she asks or agrees to receiving them. If you want a relationship, don’t send dick pics. It will do the opposite of what you want. Take a photo of yourself with a puppy. Or a guitar. Or both.
Let me know your thoughts below, I’d love to know if you have ever had a positive response to your sexting pics.